Let's play the Blame game

It’s not my fault vs. It's up to me 

...something to get you thinking 

which one are you?

There is a significant link between what you achieve, and what you believe you can achieve, in fact we are the creators of our own destiny in more ways than one. We alone are responsible for what we are capable of achieving and what we actually achieve. But why is it at times we chose to play the blame game. We blame other people, our environment, our situation, our surroundings, our friends or anything other than the real reason we don’t achieve something – ourselves. Rather than taking ownership of our goals and being responsible for the outcome, we quickly pass the buck if we fail to achieve them.

The difference between someone who achieves great things and someone who doesn’t is very simple. An achiever will take ownership of their goal and hold themselves accountable for their actions all the way through until they achieve it. They will take full responsibility for the outcome from the beginning through to the end – success or failure. With this attitude they are able to learn from their failures and quickly turn them into successes.

On the other end of the spectrum we have people who are in denial. They blame almost anything other than themselves for their failures and as a result do not learn from their mistakes. They continue this pattern of thinking and as a result their pattern in failure. It is a vicious circle, so we must be aware of our behaviour and always look to ourselves for the answer first before we play the blame game - if we play it at all...

So what can you do?

1. Take ownership of your goals
2. Keep yourself accountable for your goals
3. Take responsibility for the outcome of your efforts
4. Use your failures to propel yourself forward
5. Be successful, your success is in the palm of your hands

We are the creators of our own destiny so it is up to us to make things happen. Get out there, dream big and achieve big!

It's up to you...

Good Luck!

Nico

A plant will search for the sun - it needs to, for it to survive..

Like a plant searches for the sun, we too are in the search for our greatest need, and that is growth. Many times we change careers, change relationships, change hobbies, change our studies, change our paths in search for one thing, growth. Many of our goals are around getting better in a particular area of our life. Earlier in my posts I blogged about personal development (PD), and how crucial it is to one's success. Becoming more valuable is essential not only to excel in life, but to increase self value. From the 6 human needs, I feel that growth is our greatest - not taking away from the significance of our other human needs.

Just like a plant will; change paths in search for the sun, climb up walls, break through fences, climb up trees to penetrate a forest canopy, we too will do what it takes to experience growth. And, much like a plant if we don't see the sun, we too become stagnant.

Activity:

1. Revisit your 50 goals.
2. Assess how real they are, set a date on each one, link the goals that compliment each other.
3. Ask your self a series of questions;

• How important is this goal to me?
• How ready am I to undertake working towards this goal?
• What difference will achieving this goal make in my life?
• How will I experience some form of growth in working towards this goal?

It is important that you create an action plan for each goal - this takes time, but it also uncovers any potential barriers you may encounter upon setting towards your goal. This can also serve as a reality check - picking a goal apart lets you know how realistic it is, or it let's you know how much harder you need to work to get there. Try not to get too consumed on the planning side of things, get to work immediately. And like one of my favourite quotes says;


"Don't leave for tomorrow what you can do today"

Remember not to confuse activity with productivity. Being active is not enough, you must be productive. It is easy to get caught up doing lots of things but not getting anything done. Stop, and ask yourself the hard questions;


"What have I actually achieved today?"
Results are a great way to measure your productivity.

Regardless how dark it may be, how hard a time you might be having. Know this. Just like a plant does, if you continue to look for the sun until you find it - you will find it!

Good luck!

Nico

Keep swimming, it’s the last few strokes that separate the good from the greatest!

Imagine going for a swim.

You are gliding through the water, an unstoppable force, with your eyes set on the edge of the pool in the distance. You continue to power through the water with each and every stroke, however now you are beginning to fatigue. Still you continue to swim knowing that the edge is quite far away, you have no choice. You push and you push and suddenly you find yourself 3m away from the edge of the pool, you decide to stop!

What would you do? Gather your every last breath and push til you reach the edge? Or accept that you are going to drown and give up?

It is very often we chose the second option in this analogy when we are faced with similar scenarios in our everyday life. The common one in weight loss;

“these last two kilos are the hardest to lose, I will never get there” – and we all know very well it’s because they have simply chosen to stop swimming with 3m left to go, no other reason.

Ask yourself, how bad do you want it? Whatever your goal may be (refer to your 50 life goals). Is giving up just before the finishing line a habit of yours? Is there a pattern in your behaviour here?

A good test to perform on your behaviour is to reflect on times you have say, run a race. You have set out on the run and then began to slow down knowing the finish line was a few steps away instead of running through until you knew you crossed it. This can become a pattern in your everyday life. I will wash the dishes, but the last few I will just quickly rinse. Or I would finish all my homework tonight, but I can do that last little bit in the morning.

My suggestion to you is – See it through. Whether the task big or small, it’s not about that. It’s about seeing it through til the end with the same intensity you started. Make it a behaviour. Make it a habit. You probably know someone who gives 100% in everything they do, whether it is something small or a grand task. You see for these kinds of people giving 100% is a habit, they can’t help it. Whatever they do, they want it to be perfect or at least give it their best effort. Not a bad way to be if you ask me!

How can I become a 100% person?
Start with the small things. These are the hardest things to get motivated by. See it through and do it to the best of your ability. Slowly you will start to adopt this attitude with all tasks and challenges thrown your way, and you will become one of those people.

How will you know you are doing it? Results will come your way.

Remember; start small and work your way up. And when you find yourself 3m from the edge of the pool don’t stop! Keep swimming, it’s the last few strokes that separate the good from the greatest!

Good Luck!

Nico

Take your sunnies off, everything will look so much brighter!

Are you wearing sunglasses all the time? Do you perceive things to be worse than they actually are? Take them off! Everything will become so much brighter and better!
Sometimes we need to do what it takes to be or have what we really want.

I am sure you have heard this before. You must be before you become, or the catch phrase, fake it till you make it. 


How true is that!

Often we look at others we want to be like and wish we could; do, be, or have what they have. Not realising that we are only a set of behaviours away from doing what they do, being like they are, or having what they have. We simply give into the fact that we could never do, be or have what they have. (Is it that little voice again, telling you what is or isn't possible? do you have those sunnies on?) What we tend to do very well though, is create excuses as to why this is so. e.g
"He/She is just lucky. How could someone like that have such a nice house, drive such a nice car, have such a high position at that company, have so many friends, play at such a high level?"

You see there is no such thing as luck. Luck is when preparation meets opportunity. Being in the right place at the right time is not enough, you need to be prepared when you find yourself in the right place. When you are prepared, that is when you get results. Preparation doesn't come from making excuses as to why you aren't there yet. It comes from taking ownership of your goals and your actions.

My dad taught me this when a was very young, when all I dreamed about was becoming a football star. He said to me "the only difference between you and the best in the world is hours of training. That's it. If you want to be the best you need to do what the best are doing. If they train twice a day, you need to train twice a day to be just as good as them, but if you want to be better you need to train three times a day.

Here I am thinking, well  if the South American football stars are all training twice a day, playing football before school, at lunchtime and then after school, then I better get a move on! So I did. I would even take it as far as putting on my Brazilian Jersey after school, running out to the backyard pretending I was Ronaldo (the best at the time) and I would practice, and practice and practice. You see, I was being before I could become. I was being Ronaldo, the best.

I may have been young but what I was doing was a form of visualization, and I bet you did that too! Visualization has been monumental for me in my years pursuing my goals and dreams. I would picture myself already there, I would see it, feel it, live it and become motivated to get there. It would almost become more of a reality as I did this. Many times this served as a confidence booster. I would begin to believe that I could do it. And when you believe, that's when that little voice in your head begins to encourage you to have a go, rather than giving you 100 reasons why you might fail.

Activity - A little bit of accountability here, did you begin setting your 50 life goals?

• Pick one or a few of your 50 life goals
• Now close your eyes for 2-3mins and picture it, pretend you are there, look around, what can you see, hear, what do you feel? You have just achieved a Life Goal, what is it like!?

When you visualize your goals, they become real. When you can attach that feeling to everything you do that will propel you towards your goal, it then becomes more motivating. And with motivation anything is possible!

Give it a go, visualize your goals. Be before you become. Take ownership of your goals and behaviours. Believe you can and you will!

Good Luck!

Nico

Can you hear something?

That little voice in your head is very powerful, in fact it is always telling you what you can and can't do!

What does your little voice say? What is the story you tell yourself about what you are capable of?
Do you approach everything you do knowing you are going to do well and give it your best, or is that little voice stopping you from even trying? saying, I can't do that. Does your little voice limit what you are capable of, so as a result you become content with good enough?

Have you noticed that sometimes instead of aiming for 100%, we go into a test aiming to get anything above 50% because it is a pass. Do you notice that when we give things a go we don't try and be the best at it, rather we aim to not be the worst.
"I don't want to aim for a time in that run, I just want to run, I would be happy not to come last."
Sometimes we develop a pattern of doing just enough instead of trying to exceed in everything we do. Is this what we really want, or is it what our little voice is telling us?

Have you ever tried challenging that little voice, or changing your inner story?
Your inner story is that story you tell yourself about who you are and what you are capable of. Below are some examples that I have then challenged.
"I'm not a runner, my body wasn't designed for running" - is there a design is there?
"I will never be good at sport" - no, not with that attitude you won't be.
"I'll never lose weight, this is the best my body will be, these last 3 kilos are the hardest" - who told you that there is 3 kilos to go, who set that marker for you?

What if you approached everything with a different mind set, with a bit more belief.
"I can do that, and I'll do my best to be the best."
Or instead of saying "I am not a runner" why don't we say; "I have never run before but I will give it a go"? How many more doors and opportunities to be greater will this provide you with? Imagine the possibilities. We are capable of doing some amazing things, so why don't we let ourselves? is it that little voice?

Our little voice is fuelled by our self belief. Belief is a very powerful thing. Like many say, to believe is to achieve and I totally agree. So next time that little voice says I can't, put it on mute and have a go, because you always can. You will soon see that by having a go you will start to achieve. When you start to achieve that will fuel your belief in the most important thing, and that is, the belief in yourself!

Remember what you believe will determine what you tell yourself, your little voice, your inner story. Your little voice will control your behaviour. Your behaviour will influence your character. And your character will determine your success. So lets start being nice to ourselves and showing a little more belief.

It all starts with that little voice in our heads..

Can you hear something? Yes I can. It says I CAN DO IT!


Good Luck!

Nico

I'm not a fan of maths, but I am a fan of fractions

You are the common Denominator in everything you do. 

So why not improve you?
We prioritise all the time, but how many times do we put our Personal Development first?

Mum's will put their kids first and themselves second (or in many cases last), but as a result they lose focus on their health. This is just an example. When they could instead, focus on improving their health, and as a result, their kids enjoy a happy healthier mum?
It is often that at the risk of feeling selfish they are neglecting their own personal needs, resulting in a grumpy unhealthy mum. This in turn has a negative impact on their kids although their best intentions are at heart. Again, this is just an example.

We see this all the time, in all areas of life. The best leaders in the world are all successful in one thing, Personal Development (PD). Improving you, will directly have a positive impact in everything you do, it really is that simple.

So my question to you is; Where does PD rank in your priorities? How many hours or minutes a week do you dedicate to PD? These are some great questions to ask yourself right now and imagine if you had been doing some form of PD, what impact it could have on your life right now.

So what is PD?
Personal Development is the process that you undergo or activities that you participate in to improve the quality of your life in any area, whether it be:

• Goal Setting (your 50 life goals)
• Reading Self Help Books
• Exercise and Food plans
• Listening to audio books
• Writing a Blog
• Education/ Courses
• Dedication to some "Me Time" doing something you really enjoy (Hobby)

The list goes on, but I'm sure you get my drift.

Simple by dedicating 1 hour a day to PD, whether it is first thing in the morning or the last thing you do before you go to bed,  an extra 7 hours a week of working on your quality of life sounds pretty good doesn't it?

You could even turn this into one of your 50 goals? I will Achieve a total of 1,820 hours of PD in the next 5 years, and record this in a PD logbook. Imagine the impact this would have on your quality of life, compared to the amount of PD you are doing right now. 

Take 5 minutes to reflect on your last 5 years, and how much PD you have done/ could have done. 

This is quite a powerful exercise, and again a very simple one. 

Have you been doing enough, or any at all?

I hope this post gives you a little more clarity of how in control you are, of your quality of life.

You are the common Denominator in everything you do. So start improving YOU!

Good Luck!

Nico

 

How can you hit a target you don't have?

First of all, I have been meaning to blog for a very long while to share what has helped me stay inspired every day, and achieve what I have achieved in my life at such a young age. Many of my friends have asked me to blog my story I just didn’t think my writing would be that great, but hey, this is how you get better - by having a go. I hope you enjoy my blogging...

"Dad when I grow up I'm going to be the best soccer player in the world"

Dad and Nico

This is what I told my dad when I was 4. This was a very powerful statement, that I believe, has mapped out my entire life and continues to inspire me to become better each and every day. You see, it wasn't about becoming the best soccer player in the world, but about having direction. I knew then and there what I wanted to do and who I wanted to be, and regardless whether I got there in the end or not - I was moving forward and learning a lot about myself along the way. To this day I continue to set big goals like I did when I was 4, and like my favourite quote says;

"Life is like football, you need goals"

Along the way I have had a handful of successes alongside a truck load of failures, but the biggest lesson I have learnt is that it is the failures that move you forward in life. From a young age I learnt that in order to be successful you must not fear failure. And to this day the most common hurdle for many is exactly that, the fear of failing. I still suffer from this at times, but when I push that fear aside it’s like taking the hand brake off a car.

So how can you hit a target you don't have?

You simply can’t.

Some of us are only minutes away from getting the ball rolling. In fact, what are you doing right now? Instead of writing another 500 words for you to read, let’s do an activity right now.

Activity:

1. Write down your name in the middle of a blank page, nothing smaller than A4
2. Around your name branch off different areas of your life e.g. Health, Family, Travel, Financial etc.
3. For each area, write down 10 or so goals, large or small (take your time)
4. Brainstorm your goals and start to link goals that are relevant to each other e.g. saving $20,000 will also allow me to travel to South America with my brothers at the end of the year.
5. With each goal give yourself a date to achieve it by. Because without a deadline a goal is just a dream.
6. Get to work, the same way you decided to take action and start writing your goals, take action towards achieving them.
(ideally, you should write down 50 life goals you would like to achieve in the next 5 years)

This might seem like a very simple exercise, but it is amazing how many people don't do it, and equally as amazing as how powerful it can be when it is done. Already by writing your goals down and committing them to paper puts you in the top 3% of people who successfully achieve their goals. Take note that you will fail and expect to fail, because it’s with each attempt, that you get that little bit closer to that success you are after.

I have actually taken this exercise one step further by getting a poster made up for my 50 goals in 5 years. I will put up a photo of this poster that is currently on my office wall in my future posts, to share some of my life goals.

Remember; you cannot hit a target you don't have. Set some goals and don’t let the fear of failure stop you from doing anything you want to do. Expect to fail and expect to succeed.

Good Luck and stay tuned..

Nic Rouco